So I am having kind of an emotional day...a GOOD emotional day. We went in for our 36 week appointment yesterday and the doc sent us to the hospital for a non stress test since the baby's heart rate was low and movement had decreased. Long story short...HE IS FINE!! He is AWESOME actually! They did an ultrasound to check size again due to Gracens small size and at 35wks and 5 days this boy is measuring at a whopping 6lbs 13oz! Now granted they could be off by as much as + or - 12 oz...but that still means we are having a "normal" sized baby! So once all the tests were done the nurse took me on a tour of the hospital rooms. That started the emotions. Let me explain...
I have never had a baby brought to my chest at the hospital...they always wisk them away before I can even see their little faces. I have never had the luxury of nursing my newborn moments after he is born. Gracen nearly died in utero due to the knots in his cord...something that was totally random and unexpected yet I have felt guilty for 3 years. Somehow it had to be my fault. Noah was not only taken to a different hospital but also spent 3 days in the NICU due to wet lungs. Not exactly the deliveries most Moms envision when they think about having a baby. But I have two amazing, active boys and you would never guess they had a rough start to life, so for that I am Grateful!!!
The nurse was explaining to me how once the baby is born they will bring him to my chest to snuggle and then they will keep him in the room to examine him as they have their heated cradles in every room. I started to tear up...and she asked if something was wrong. I explained my previous deliveries to her and she teared up too...she said so many people take for granted the little things like that. I felt this wave of gratitude....to God, my doctors, my Husband, my Mom and Dad, my friends...everyone who has listened everytime I called with worries and anxiety. This baby is going to be different. He is healthy, he is strong and I CAN do it.
So THANK YOU family, THANK YOU friends for your support and love during this pregnancy. I know I am a bit nutty at times...but you all have stuck by us and showered us with love and encouragement. We are about to have another wild monkey boy on our hands and for that I am extremely grateful!
Love,
Crystal
Friday, October 9, 2009
Gratitude
Posted by FarnsworthFam at 9:18 AM
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2 comments:
wow Crystal, you made me cry :') I can't imagine not being able to hold my children immediately after they were born. I'm so happy thatyou're going to experience this and that you realize what a very special moment that really is. I'll keep praying that everything goes smoothly the rest of the way! Good luck, God bless, and I can't wait to see pictures!
I'm so happy for you Crystal! Sometimes it takes those difficult struggles in life to really get to see the blessings! What an amazing thing to snuggle with your newborn the second he is born! God is amazing! Hang in there! Love you and still praying for you these last few weeks!
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